The Daily 10: November 15

Thomas Allen Heald presents The Ten Most Important Things That Ever
Happened on This Day in History(*)

Most Important Autographs: Page six of the Articles of Confederation and
Perpetual Union are signed by the Second Continental Congress, on this
day in 1777. As the first governing document for the U.S., it allows the
colonies to declare war. (It takes almost 4 years for all of the
colonies to approve. FUN FACT: The Articles of Confederation are perhaps
the most important American document from which nobody (except legal
aliens who've been granted citizenship) can actually quote a single line.

The Most Important MapQuest (TIE): On this day in 1763, land surveyors
Jeremiah Dixon and Charles Mason begin mapping out the southern boundary
of Pennsylvania. Allowing Jeff Foxworthy a career of jokes about not
being a "white neck." And ... this day in 1806: Explorer Zebulon Pike
spots the top of a 14,511 granite formation on the Front Range in
Colorado. Thank goodness he chooses not to name his find "Zebulon's
Peak." (He is not, however the first explorer to climb the monstrosity.
That's Edwin James.)

The Most Important Person Born on This Day: painter Georgia O'Keeffe
(1887), without whom generations would never have thought that
decomposing animal skulls should be wall art.

The Most Important Smoking on a Non-Smoking Flight: On this day in 1979,
a package being flown on American Airlines Flight 444 from Chicago to
Washington D.C. begins fogging up the cargo hold and causing the
passengers to choke. If the package had a return address, it would read
"Unabomer" c/o Ted Kaczynski. Had the timing mechanism of the device not
failed, it would have packed enough punch "to obliterate"727. It lands
safely, and the passengers are treated.

The Most Important Reason You're Fat: On this day in 1969, Hippies find
it easy to enjoy being a square -- if you're a hamburger that is. Former
KFC sales guru Dave Thomas invites you to sample the "Old Fashioned
Hamburgers" he's selling at the Ohio joint named after his daughter
Melinda (AKA "Wendy.")

The Most Important Sports Event: On this day in 1992, Richard Petty
closes out his 35-year career with the classiest possible the race:
Atlanta Motor Speedway's "Hooter's 500." He crashes and the vehicle fire
ends his chance at the checkered flag.

Most Important Murder: On this day in 1959, "Dick" Hickock and Perry
Smith slaughter Herbert, Bonnie, Kenyon and Nancy Clutter of Holcomb,
Kansas, as Truman Capote later deems it ... "In Cold Blood."

Most Important Thing for Radio Talk Show Blowhards to Whine About: The
very first unemployment check is approved by the Social Security
Administration, on this bureaucratic day in 1939.

Most Important Tabloid Headline: Long Island Lolita's Lothario Joey
Buttafuoco is sentenced to six months for raping Amy Fisher, on this day
in 1993, after the jilted younger lover shot and wounded her
competition, Mary Jo.

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(*) Because I said so.
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